Tag: life experiences

A Time And A Season For All Things

season

I saw her coming down the aisle. Shopping cart half loaded and small children hanging off of it. A baby carrier was nestled in the top portion.

A young mom juggling several small lives and gathering food for her clan.

We passed giving each other the polite smile. I contemplated her life and thought how very far away that all felt from me at this point.

I’m thankful to still feel young and energetic but my “little children” days are a few years back now.

My oldest just turned 27. My last pregnancy was in 1994.

I’m a grandmother.

I will be (again) as my son and his wife just announced they are expecting in October =)  Being a grandparent really is way better than you can imagine… really… it’s so different from raising your own kids.  And it’s kind of crazy seeing your children as adults, still your kids, but all grown up and you’re in this different place with them.

I’ve often been reminded of this truth from the writer of Ecclesiastes… “there is a time for everything and a season for every activity under the heavens”

When I was in my baby making days, ( I don’t participate in this activity anymore haha) it seemed like that part of life would go on forever. Well meaning people told me to savor and enjoy it as it would go by fast. Yet somehow, when you’re in the mix of diapers, lacking sleep, trying to keep your home orderly and make sure the baby doesn’t eat the cat liter it seems very far away indeed.

I gave birth to three beautiful sons, spaced nicely apart. I had good pregnancies and easy deliveries. I remember the nurse telling me I had a body perfect for having babies…I laughed and told her I wasn’t making a hobby out of it! 😉 I breastfed all of them successfully and loved the activity of being able to feed my sons. They were fat ( uh chubby) and healthy.

My husband and I had agreed three was our number… no matter what number 3 was… we were stopping. When my third son entered the world I was happy and joyful and had zero remorse that a girl hadn’t been born to me. He was tiny, perfect, and a total delight.

I won’t lie and tell you I didn’t go through my own season of grief realizing I would never experience those things again. Never feel life stir in me, that first movement, hearing the heartbeat, seeing that sono image, watching my belly grow larger as my child grew in me.

The anticipation of their arrival. The joy of seeing what I had when they were born ( We did not find out what any of ours were beforehand… super cool)

Not experience the joy of nursing them and the sweet moments that those times offered.  The sleepy times where they lay on my chest, the softness of their breath lulling me to sleep as I breathed in their sweet baby scent. The feel of that soft downy hair under my hand.

Those moments do go by all to quickly I was reminded as my 6’6 first born walked in and enveloped me in a huge hug before dinner last night.

A time and a season for every activity under heaven indeed.

I guess I’m at a point in my life I’m privileged? blessed? to look back and see those seasons, appreciate them, and know they are a normal part of the rhythm and flow of life.

Now, I see young moms and think “God bless them” followed by… “I’m glad I’m through all that!” And “I like having my body all to myself” haha at this season in life I’ll be honest and say I’m enjoying my freedom.

My seasons involve my children getting married, preparing for college, making future plans, getting blessed with grandbabies and watching my youngest approach her senior year of school.

Ahhhh my last one in school!

There have been seasons of change in my personal life, and my own childhood family.

There have been seasons of loss, and seasons of the celebration of life.

And for me, exciting seasons of contemplating adventures and new things I want to do.

I love the point I am in life right now.

Yes, I’ve moved through seasons that are done. Yes, some of them I’ve grieved. Some of them I’ve celebrated passing through! Some have been downright painful and full of struggle.

But what is rather amazing and awesome is the fact, we (all) will continue to move through new seasons in our lives.

I’m thankful to be where I am, to be strong and energetic and eager for the new seasons unfolding in front of me.

There are so many things to pursue!

I’ve tried to learn, to view, to accept, that seasons in our life are what makes life. I often refer to them as new adventures.

Sometimes they are hard. Sometimes painful, joyful, or confusing. They are what makes life.

What do you think ? Is life made up in this way, seasons that we pass through ? Where are you now ?  Have you learned to accept and embrace where you are ?

 

Mom 101

Moms. If we all share one thing in common, we don’t get into this world without one. If we’re fortunate we grow up with one that we manage to use and abuse, torture, and love and share life with.  Ideally, we learn from them in the ways of living life and lurch out into the world as somewhat well behaved, respectful, and productive citizens.

That’s the plan.

I remember  years back during a long day that felt really demanding having this thought slam into me at the force of a F5 hurricane…..

“OMG…. I’m the mom now……”

My heart was racing and I broke out into a sweat sinking into a chair as that thought washed over me.

Well, not really, but it was definitely one of those moments. Not that I hadn’t been a “mom” already at that point it just seemed that the light bulb came on.

I was going to be the room mom, project manager for all those lovely school projects, comforter during illnesses and relationship break ups, washer of mounds of clothes, baker and chef, chauffeur, etiquette teacher, counselor & advisor, maid of a neat and clean home for them to inhabit, lunch maker and slicer of apples and crust removal…. or my favorite… I can’t create a major school project out of a few toilet paper rolls the night before it’s due because you “forgot” even though they assigned it months ago 😛 Oh gosh, the list can go on.

We take care of those creatures… meet their needs and hopefully give them stability and a good life.

BUT in the mix of offering yourself up like a sacrifice to these creatures… perhaps they get to comfy with how well we take care of them.

For example, they develop a blind eye to glops of toothpaste in the sink, and learn to skillfully and carefully balance a single piece of trash on the (obviously) overflowing trash can. I’ve watched to see how long a roll of toilet paper could be left to wander around the floor before someone might take the 1.2 seconds to pop it in place ( note… sometimes the empty roll is all that’s left 😉  An empty dishwasher is certainly an invitation to leave them on the counter…

They must believe a magical fairy lives among them providing a clean home for them to live in… 😉

Then I had this thought… maybe… it’s me. Maybe I’m the odd one. No one else seems troubled by all the things I mentioned above. Like… not at all. They move through their days seemingly oblivious to the things that make me twitch.

I did an experiment the other morning. During the night it was obvious one of the dogs had lifted some trash from their bathroom trash can… it was like… right in the walk way to get into the bathroom…. I decided I’d leave it and see if someone would pick it up… or if they would just continue to step over it…I figured if no one got picked it up it would still be there waiting for me 😉

After awhile one son mentioned it and I casually said I was doing an experiment to see if people would continue to walk around it, or actually go ahead and pick it up….

To my surprise, after awhile, I realized it was gone.

There. Is. Hope.

I do know this, that even if my kids aren’t overly worried about housekeeping at this point, they can cook and do laundry, and have a working knowledge of managing their money, they have manners and know how to be respectful and polite. They are funny and kind. They understand the importance of working and investing themselves into it. Yeah,and they really do know how to clean ’cause I’ve seen them get after it before their friends come over haha it always impresses me that they keep those cleaning skills so well hidden 😉

So yeah, it is a rather non-stop, often thankless, hard, never ending job as a mom…. but then when you see your kids turning into adults and realizing that they really are getting it, makes you realize all that work, time and frustration over heaping trash and goopy toothpaste was all worth while .

They make you laugh. They make you cry. They frustrate you to the point of no return and you have had mental images of wrapping your hands around their throat 😉

Have you had those “mom” moments? I don’t want to leave the guys out either. But have you had moments in parenting that you…really…wondered? And yet somehow you’ve managed to get your kids to adulthood and want to celebrate that fact ’cause honestly, at times, you just weren’t sure you were gonna pull it off ?