I saw her coming down the aisle. Shopping cart half loaded and small children hanging off of it. A baby carrier was nestled in the top portion.
A young mom juggling several small lives and gathering food for her clan.
We passed giving each other the polite smile. I contemplated her life and thought how very far away that all felt from me at this point.
I’m thankful to still feel young and energetic but my “little children” days are a few years back now.
My oldest just turned 27. My last pregnancy was in 1994.
I’m a grandmother.
I will be (again) as my son and his wife just announced they are expecting in October =) Being a grandparent really is way better than you can imagine… really… it’s so different from raising your own kids. And it’s kind of crazy seeing your children as adults, still your kids, but all grown up and you’re in this different place with them.
I’ve often been reminded of this truth from the writer of Ecclesiastes… “there is a time for everything and a season for every activity under the heavens”
When I was in my baby making days, ( I don’t participate in this activity anymore haha) it seemed like that part of life would go on forever. Well meaning people told me to savor and enjoy it as it would go by fast. Yet somehow, when you’re in the mix of diapers, lacking sleep, trying to keep your home orderly and make sure the baby doesn’t eat the cat liter it seems very far away indeed.
I gave birth to three beautiful sons, spaced nicely apart. I had good pregnancies and easy deliveries. I remember the nurse telling me I had a body perfect for having babies…I laughed and told her I wasn’t making a hobby out of it! 😉 I breastfed all of them successfully and loved the activity of being able to feed my sons. They were fat ( uh chubby) and healthy.
My husband and I had agreed three was our number… no matter what number 3 was… we were stopping. When my third son entered the world I was happy and joyful and had zero remorse that a girl hadn’t been born to me. He was tiny, perfect, and a total delight.
I won’t lie and tell you I didn’t go through my own season of grief realizing I would never experience those things again. Never feel life stir in me, that first movement, hearing the heartbeat, seeing that sono image, watching my belly grow larger as my child grew in me.
The anticipation of their arrival. The joy of seeing what I had when they were born ( We did not find out what any of ours were beforehand… super cool)
Not experience the joy of nursing them and the sweet moments that those times offered. The sleepy times where they lay on my chest, the softness of their breath lulling me to sleep as I breathed in their sweet baby scent. The feel of that soft downy hair under my hand.
Those moments do go by all to quickly I was reminded as my 6’6 first born walked in and enveloped me in a huge hug before dinner last night.
A time and a season for every activity under heaven indeed.
I guess I’m at a point in my life I’m privileged? blessed? to look back and see those seasons, appreciate them, and know they are a normal part of the rhythm and flow of life.
Now, I see young moms and think “God bless them” followed by… “I’m glad I’m through all that!” And “I like having my body all to myself” haha at this season in life I’ll be honest and say I’m enjoying my freedom.
My seasons involve my children getting married, preparing for college, making future plans, getting blessed with grandbabies and watching my youngest approach her senior year of school.
Ahhhh my last one in school!
There have been seasons of change in my personal life, and my own childhood family.
There have been seasons of loss, and seasons of the celebration of life.
And for me, exciting seasons of contemplating adventures and new things I want to do.
I love the point I am in life right now.
Yes, I’ve moved through seasons that are done. Yes, some of them I’ve grieved. Some of them I’ve celebrated passing through! Some have been downright painful and full of struggle.
But what is rather amazing and awesome is the fact, we (all) will continue to move through new seasons in our lives.
I’m thankful to be where I am, to be strong and energetic and eager for the new seasons unfolding in front of me.
There are so many things to pursue!
I’ve tried to learn, to view, to accept, that seasons in our life are what makes life. I often refer to them as new adventures.
Sometimes they are hard. Sometimes painful, joyful, or confusing. They are what makes life.
What do you think ? Is life made up in this way, seasons that we pass through ? Where are you now ? Have you learned to accept and embrace where you are ?